Do. It. Yourself

I've been quiet for a while because I've been writing (songs), reading this month's books (3 of them) and living. I've also been trying to figure out how to make this album release as painless as possible. 3 months ago I shot a music video for the Das Kapital remix of 'Today is the Day'. I kept making promises to upload it but... Nothing happened. Well here is a video explaining my woes.




What's the point of doing this is if I can't have fun? I honestly got so caught up in what wasn't being done, that I forgot that I can ALWAYS DO something about my situation.

Never Forget

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

 

- William Ernest Henley

Say it aint so

I am a CSI and Criminal Intent lover. I especially have a soft spot for CSI Miami. Don't get me wrong; CSI (Las Vegas) will always be THE ONE, but I really enjoy David Caruso's one liners on CSI Miami. I just found out (via Hurricane Vanessa) that CSI Miami has been cancelled. *falls to knees and sobs*

Whhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!

Below areDavid Caruso's finest moments on screen. It is not an episode until he has given a one liner and put his glasses back on. R.I.P CSI Miami

Go with the flow

Via Zulu Dancer

Expansion

Via Poor Artists


I've been working on my album for about 2 and a half years. Not every day or every week, but on and off. I have also been writing (fiction) and that has been something calming and therapeutic for me. Whilst it has been therapeutic for the past few years I have started feeling a little stuck. Stuck and broken. I came across this image on Poor Artist and it spoke to me.

The sculpture (entitled Expansion) is the work of artist Paige Bradley “From the moment we are born, the world tends to have a container already built for us to fit inside: a social security number, a gender, a race, a profession,” says Bradley. “I ponder if we are more defined by the container we are in than what we are inside. Would we recognize ourselves if we could expand beyond our bodies?” (via Poor Artists)

Like the woman in the sculpture I am trying to find inner peace when I feel so broken. The past few years have been about my creativity that I may very well have forgotten about ll my other needs. I want to travel, I want to COMPLETE my album and books, I want something different. I need a change so badly. I also need peace. There has been waaaay too much 'fighting and struggling' in my life lately.

Marcee turns 30 in September and we have agreed to embark on 'make small changes' journey. Small changes will hopefully lead to big changes. Wish me luck and strength.

Porcelain. Out!

April Book (Dr Seuss)

When I told Marcee what my April Book was she laughed. I am not kiddding when I say that 'Oh, The Places You'll Go' is one of my favourite books. I only read it 2 years ago and often revisit it when I am feeling down or need perspective. Once when asked to give a talk to a bunch of really inspirational 'dance for life' contestants, I read bits from the book to make a few points. Its fun to quote the 'great thinkers' of our time but nobody does it better than Dr Seuss.

This is what my cover looks like too. Too lazy to take a pic blah blah blah

But on you will go
though the weather be foul.
On you will go
though your enemies prowl.
On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl.
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike.
And I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

- Dr Seuss (Oh, The Places You'll Go)

Read this book and thank me later ;)

No Country For Women

I remember how MAD South Africans were when Charlize Theron did the 'real men don't rape' ad below.



This morning I cried when I read the news about the 16/17 year old girl who was gang raped. Not only was the whole thing filmed but it has gone viral. According to this CNN article (and Charlize) a woman is raped in South Africa every 26 seconds. It truly is shocking when not being raped is a matter of luck in my country.

I'm both mad and sad that this happens all the time in South Africa. I will never stop being mad or sad. I refuse to accept that this is how we live. Even more infuriating is that there were people on Twitter who were asking to see the video. WHAT IS GOING ON HERE PEOPLE?!

I wonder what those who were infuriated by Charlize Theron's ad have to say now? I'm tired of hearing the outraged voices of women only. I would love to hear from the men too.

Heart is heavy.

Please...

Via the classy issue

quick album update

I am starting to feel like there is 2 of me (is that even grammatically correct?). There is a part of me that is working endlessly and grateful when wonderful stuff happens. Then there is the other part of me that is just a ball of anxiety.

The closer we get to album release date, the stronger both these parts of me become. I look at this way: It is different sides of the same coin. I'm most anxious when I am by myself. I'm sick in bed today so I don't have to tell you what kind of a day its been.

When the anxiety gets too much, I remind myself this:

• I am living my dream everyday
• No matter what happens I am LOVED and I LOVE
• I am worthy of having my dreams come true regardless of what I have or haven't done

And I also remember how amazing I felt wearing that dress on Expresso (cheesy, but it helps):

Story of my life yo!

Via simonefiasco

Conclusion

via Nikia Phoenix

And I am not interested in being anybody else for somebody else.

Not entirely sure about this one

via retro glo

It's probably true. But I hate the pressure today. I really do.

One of dem days

I'm having an off day. This whole week has felt a little wonky. I just wanna hide out in my room and these migraines have been kicking my ass. I've had 2 this week, which means I have been out of action all week.



Ms Thang was one of my favourite albums when I was younger. It, like many of my albums, was stolen. I loved Monica's sexy tomboy vibes. Her, Brandy and Aaliyah were my girls when I was in my teens.